HUMOR: Good Error Messages

Subject: HUMOR: Good Error Messages
From: Andrew Plato <intrepid_es -at- yahoo -dot- com>
To: Techwrl-l <techwr-l -at- lists -dot- raycomm -dot- com>
Date: Tue, 29 Feb 2000 19:47:06 -0800 (PST)

..And here is one WITH text.

A recent post asked for error message suggestions. Well...that's an open door
for some fun.

Recommended Error Messages

The item you selected is, like, way gone. You're screwed buttwad.

WARNING: The file you requested is not available. Getting depressed about it
won't help either.

Your connection has failed, would you like to bend over and take it like a man
or just send us your credit card?

You again?

In case of failure, blame Microsoft.

INFO: Stop touching that and get to work.

The document you requested is, FULL, no other useful information is available
at this time.

STOP or there will be, trouble.

Your request that you just made contains extraneous information which is in
excess of what information is necessary to be provided for this request which
had to much data. Please move to a foreign country and work for slave wages.

Why do you click things that hurt?

Did you forget to press the pound key? Did your parents beat you when you were
young?

Wow! You're really stupid. It's a good thing you've already paid for this lame
excuse for software.

Problem: You have no idea what you're doing.
Solution: RTFM*

Attention: This program is not valid in states with active consumer fraud
legislation.

WARNING: This is your last chance to make an ass out of yourself.

Object Not Found: Intelligence
Reboot and start your life over.

Missing RunTime Library - Please contact somebody who cares.

And the all time best error message:

ERROR: If you are having trouble using this program then you have bigger
problems than not knowing how to use this program.



*Read the F**king Manual

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