HUMOR: Effective Tech Writing

Subject: HUMOR: Effective Tech Writing
From: Andrew Plato <intrepid_es -at- yahoo -dot- com>
To: Techwrl-l <techwr-l -at- lists -dot- raycomm -dot- com>
Date: Tue, 21 Mar 2000 18:08:39 -0800 (PST)

CoolPad ain't the only one having with effective tech writing as exemplified
with this fine work I found in my new Injunction Facilitator from Strategicus
Coitus Partners International Inc.

Quick Start Guide for The HyperMegaStreaming Media Delta Three-Six-Eight
Injunction Facilitator.

1. Rip open package in a mad craze to see what is inside.
2. Extract product from foam crap.
3. Fondle gadgets inspecting all the cool buttons and blinking things that will
impress your friends.
4. Glance very briefly at the cover of the amazing, award-winning, process
driven documentation labored over for months by resentful contractors who were
all eaten by alligators by the loathesome agencies that placed them.
5. Plug in the gadget. 110 volts is preferable but, hey, go for the 220 outlet
just for fun.
6. Push buttons until the product or you make noise.
7. Whinny in joy at the pleasure of having a new gadget. Thrust fist into air
screaming "I rule!"
8. Poke buttons and hope the product does what you want.

NOTE: If the product fails to do what you want, it is most likely Microsoft's,
Canada's, or the Military Industrial Complex's fault.

9. Say "What a rip off"
10. Get on the Internet and download the latest Whathutsamcjammer.
11. Insexurate the phantalmalanator with a sequential phasic fanstination joule
until the ratchet housing tempered mega-snare is fully dexterous.
12. Wiggle the cord.
13. Wiggle your ass.
14. Press CTRL-ALT-DEL. Press F5-Page Down-BackSpace.
15. Call technical support.
16. Bitch.
17. Don't forget to fill out the registration card for exclusive spam mail!

ATTENTION: The EULA included with this product releases Strategic Coitus
Partners International Inc. from all liability, even the stuff we didn't know
about.


Andrew Plato


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