Re: Comma question

Subject: Re: Comma question
From: Karen Felker <akaren -at- earthlink -dot- net>
To: techwr-l -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com
Date: Tue, 23 Jul 2013 12:55:37 -0700

Thanks to everyone for all your valuable input. After more discussion with reviewers, the sentences have been rewritten to ensure clarity and coherence.

Karen

On Jul 22, 2013, at 10:55 PM, techwr-l-request -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com wrote:

> Date: Mon, 22 Jul 2013 12:15:13 -0700
> From: Lauren <lauren -at- writeco -dot- net>
> To: techwr-l -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com
> Subject: Re: Comma question
> Message-ID: <51ED84C1 -dot- 3090901 -at- writeco -dot- net>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1; format=flowed
>
> You received a lot of good suggestions and some suggestions may have
> said too much.
>
> One rule of commas in the sense that you may be using this one is that
> the parts of the sentence that are separated by the comma should work
> when their positions are switched and the comma is removed. For example,
> "2, 1" would be "1 2" and make logical sense either way. Your sentence
> fails this test, since it screams for the comma when the phrases are
> switched, even when you add the missing object.
>
> It is really not clear from your sentence construction what the phrase
> is qualifying. Is it events, numbers, or actors and events? If it
> qualifies numbers, then put it after numbers. If it qualifies events,
> then replace the comma with "that are." If it qualifies actors and
> events, then delete the comma.
>
> Whatever the case, I think the sentence needs a rewrite. It is awkward.
>
> Lauren
>
>
> On 7/19/2013 9:28 AM, Karen Felker wrote:
>> A reviewer is disputing my use of a comma in this sentence that describes a clustering algorithm: "Assigns numbers to actors and events, based on natural groups called clusters."
>>
>> I want to defend this comma, but I'm not sure how to do that. Does "based" introduce an adverbial phrase, because it describes the assigning process?
>> I find it confusing to change the sentence to say "Assigns numbers, based on natural groups called clusters, to actors and events."
>> Same with this rewrite: "Assigns numbers to actors and events. The numbers are based on natural groups called clusters."
>



^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
New! Doc-to-Help 2013 features the industry's first HTML5 editor for authoring.

Learn more: http://bit.ly/ZeOZeQ

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

You are currently subscribed to TECHWR-L as archive -at- web -dot- techwr-l -dot- com -dot-

To unsubscribe send a blank email to
techwr-l-leave -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com


Send administrative questions to admin -at- techwr-l -dot- com -dot- Visit
http://www.techwhirl.com/email-discussion-groups/ for more resources and info.

Looking for articles on Technical Communications? Head over to our online magazine at http://techwhirl.com

Looking for the archived Techwr-l email discussions? Search our public email archives @ http://techwr-l.com/archives


Previous by Author: Re: Comma question
Next by Author: RE: Why is so hard to for [any company] to take documentation seriously?
Previous by Thread: RE: Comma question
Next by Thread: RE: Arguments for NOT using topics as parents to other topics in DITA-maps


What this post helpful? Share it with friends and colleagues:

Sponsored Ads


Sponsored Ads