Caution Rewrite

Subject: Caution Rewrite
From: LaVonna Funkhouser <lffunkhouser -at- HALNET -dot- COM>
Date: Fri, 21 Jan 1994 09:03:29 -0600

(Sorry, my last message was sent without comment.)

Bonni and others have suggested rewrites that begin
with "Be sure" (see below). Is this really any better than
the "Do not" approach with base substituted for feet?

To be honest, they look more like feet (there are two)
than a base.

LaVonna
lffunkhouser -at- halnet -dot- com

----- Begin message from hsll05 21-Jan-94

Return-Path: hsll05
To: hsll05, techwr-l%osuvm1 -dot- bitnet -at- internet
Subject: caution rewrite
Date: Fri, 21 Jan 94 08:47:30 -0600
From: "LaVonna Funkhouser" <hsll05>
X-Mts: smtp


> Organization: Proteon, Inc., Westborough, MA 01581 [(508)898-2800]
> Subject: Re[2]: More allergic reactions... How would you...?
> Comments: To: techwr-l%osuvm1 -dot- bitnet -at- pucc -dot- princeton -dot- edu, fred -at- BOOLE -dot- COM
> To: Multiple recipients of list TECHWR-L <TECHWR-L%OSUVM1 -dot- BITNET -at- internet>

> > "CAUTION--RISK OF FIRE
> > DO NOT OPERATE HEATER WITHOUT FEET ATTACHED
> > IN CORRECT POSITION"
> >
> >How would you clarify the caution above without getting
> >too verbose?

> >"CAUTION--RISK OF FIRE
> >BE SURE THE HEATER'S FEET ARE ATTACHED
> >IN CORRECT POSITION DURING OPERATION"

> or call the heater's feet "base":

> "Be sure the base is attached in correct position during operation"

> Bonni Graham |
> Technical Writer |
> Easel Corporation, ENFIN Technology Lab | Never tell people how to
> Bonni_Graham_at_Enfin-SD -at- relay -dot- proteon -dot- com | do things. Tell them
> President, San Diego STC | what to do and they will
> | surprise you with their
> NOTE: apparently my email address needs | ingenuity.
> to be typed exactly as it appears here, |
> punctuation and all, or the system gets | --George Patton
> upset. |



----- End forwarded message


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