FAQ Humor (Humour)

Subject: FAQ Humor (Humour)
From: "Murrell, Thomas" <TMurrell -at- alldata -dot- net>
To: "'TECHWR-L'" <TECHWR-L -at- LISTS -dot- RAYCOMM -dot- COM>
Date: Tue, 25 Jan 2000 16:14:54 -0500

Frequently Asked Questions And The Answers We'd Like To Give

Q: How do I unsubscribe from TECHWR-L?
A: Post a job ad without submitting it to the listowner.

Q: How do I make MS Word act like FrameMaker?
A: You don't. Buy FrameMaker.

Q: How do I make FrameMaker act like MS Word?
A: You don't. Buy MS Word.

Q: I have a Journalism Degree but I can't get a job that pays as much as
working in fast food. How do I break into Technical Writing. I hear you
make good money.
A: Well isn't that just tough, Fry Breath. You should have thought of that
while you were partying and the Geeks were studying.

Q: I have an English Literature Degree, and I can't get any kind of a job.
Can I break into Technical Writing?
A: No, you have to be able to write.

Q: How do I keep people from reading copyrighted material without my
company's permission?
A: Don't publish it.

Q: How come when I ask a question on the list I get so many contradictory
A: You assume there is one right answer. There rarely is.

Q: How come when I ask a question on the list I get so many vague and
ambiguous answers?
A: It depends.

Q: Why is it that I send a question to the list, but nobody answers it?
A: How many emails do you want saying, "I don't know?"

Q: I asked the list their opinions on using "How to make a peanut butter
sandwich" as an exercise in a presentation I'm about to make. How come I'm
still receiving death threats?
A: Don't push it.

Q: I want to use a serif font, but my boss insists I use a san serif font.
What do I do?
A: You have a boss who knows fonts?
A: Think about it: Who signs your checks? Who writes your review? (Take
your time; I know this is a difficult one.)

Q: We're writing documentation to be put in binders. Which is better:
3-hole, 5-hole, or 7-hole? Or is there something else we should use?
A: Go with a red binder. They're more attention-getting and your users
might not lose them as quickly.

Q: Why don't I get the respect I deserve as a valued contributor at work?
A: Maybe you don't whine enough?

Closing Remark:
The above was intended to be humorous (or humourous) and light-hearted. I
was not poking fun at any one individual. For the record, I have TWO
degrees in English Literature.

Tom Murrell

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