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Subject:Re: Declarative vs. imperative From:"Richard G. Combs" <richard -dot- combs -at- voyanttech -dot- com> To:"TECHWR-L" <techwr-l -at- lists -dot- raycomm -dot- com> Date:Thu, 6 Jun 2002 09:19:10 -0600
A colleague of Ruby Isaacs <ruby -at- quendi -dot- ca> wrote:
>>"I am working on a manual of procedures concerning safety for inspectors
and have come across a mishmash of text that switches from....declarative
statements such as 'Inspectors must always....' to ones addressed directly
to the reader that are imperative such as 'you must never ... you are
required to be....'
>>My instinct is to improve the text by choosing to describe inspectors'
actions, but at the same time I am concerned that the message may be more
successfully delivered by the imperatives.
OK, here's my advice in two different forms:
1) The writer is advised to address the reader directly when instructing the
reader to perform certain actions. The writer can do this by using second
person imperative.
2) Tell the reader clearly and directly what to do. Use second person
imperative.
Now, which one communicates more quickly and effectively?
If safety is an issue, ask yourself this: If you see someone about to touch
a live wire, would you say "To avoid shock, workers must not touch live
wires," or would you say "Don't touch that; it will shock you"?
If you're writing a procedure for the reader to follow, you aren't
"improving" the text by using the third person. You're merely obscuring the
meaning by suggesting that someone *other* than the reader should or will do
what you're describing.
HTH!
Richard
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Richard G. Combs
Senior Technical Writer
Voyant Technologies, Inc.
richardDOTcombs AT voyanttechDOTcom
303-223-5111
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rgcombs AT freeDASHmarketDOTnet
303-777-0436
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