Re: Number of actions per step

Subject: Re: Number of actions per step
From: Alexia Prendergast <alexiap -at- SEAGATESOFTWARE -dot- COM>
Date: Tue, 16 Sep 1997 08:28:02 -0400

I got several e-mails asking why I used the passive in the following:

>> From the Cooking menu, select Brownies, then Best Fudge, then With Nuts
> The recipe for Fudge Brownies with Nuts is displayed.

I thought I'd reply to the list since I'm sure I'll get more ;-)

There are a few reasons I would use this structure:
-It's more precise (the window doesn't open on its own--something (the
application) displays it. However, the passive puts the emphasis on the
object in which we are interested (the recipe).)
-The users already know why they are doing the step (I tell them why
they are going to do something before they do it), so I would rather
confirm what happened at the end than be redundant by saying "to display
... " at the end of the step.
-By separating the two pieces of information, there's no question
between what they did and what happened as a result. (I don't usually
tell them the result after every single step--just at the end of a
procedure or at the end of a step where something notable happens.)
-If I were describing an *optional* step in a series of steps, I would
write something like this: "To display the Fudge Brownie recipe, select
the following from the Brownies menu: Best Fudge, then With Nuts." By
starting with the reason why they would do that particular step, users
can quickly decide if they need to do it or not.

I don't normally analyze things to death like this -- I'd never get my
writing done! ;-) I've just found that this style works well for my
users.

A.

--
Alexia Prendergast
Senior Technical Writer
Seagate Software
mailto:alexiap -at- sems -dot- com

>-----Original Message-----
> ... I'm always looking for examples of appropriate uses of
>the passive, however, and am curious to know why you would find it more
>appropriate here than the more descriptive (to me) "The recipe {name}
>opens."
>-----Original Message-----
>>> From the Cooking menu, select Brownies, then Best Fudge, then With Nuts
>"to display the recipe for Fudge Brownies.">
>
>Why waste words with passive construction?
>

TECHWR-L (Technical Communication) List Information: To send a message
to 2500+ readers, e-mail to TECHWR-L -at- LISTSERV -dot- OKSTATE -dot- EDU -dot- Send commands
to LISTSERV -at- LISTSERV -dot- OKSTATE -dot- EDU (e.g. HELP or SIGNOFF TECHWR-L).
Search the archives at http://www.documentation.com/ or search and
browse the archives at http://listserv.okstate.edu/archives/techwr-l.html


Previous by Author: Re: Number of actions per step
Next by Author: Re: Speaking of Improper Terminology
Previous by Thread: Re[2]: Number of actions per step
Next by Thread: Re: Number of actions per step


What this post helpful? Share it with friends and colleagues:


Sponsored Ads